We had a beautiful weekend. The weather was warm and the sun was bright. I took the opportunity to wash the winter woolies in preparation for storage. The hammock worked beautifully to dry them all in double quick time!
I sat out to watch them dry, to knit and to supervise Dexter. We bought him a big knuckle bone at the pet store. You should have seen his eyes light up when they spotted this beauty.
But it was too big! Poor puppy. Fortunately, Jim is handy with an axe and he chopped that thing in two for Dexter.
Every Thursday Dexter and I go to Rally-O and agility class. Last Thursday the trainer said to me "Laurie, you don't give yourself enough credit. Dexter is doing awesome." For some reason, I really heard her that night and it has changed my attitude over these past several days. I always felt like I wasn't doing enough, that Dexter wasn't responding well enough, or that he wasn't behaving well enough. Enough for what?!
And I recognize that this is an old pattern of mine. This feeling of "not enough". It's an uncomfortable way to live, let me tell you. It used to be that there was never enough food. I would obsess about it. Then I switched to knitting. Healthier for my system at first, since I stopped eating as much. But ultimately, sitting on the couch knitting non-stop wasn't good for me either. I knew getting a dog would be a good thing for me, to keep me moving, but I didn't think I'd switch my "not enough" obsession over to him.
You know, recognizing the pattern is the first step. I'm really glad I can see it. Now I can accept it, and consciously evaluate, yes there is enough. I live with abundance, I can enjoy quality instead of hording quantity, and I accept that sometimes, you just have to live with good enough.